Friday - turning the calendar

Made it to Friday!  A great day for a TON of reasons!  My top 3 (for this specific Friday) are as follows: 1 - I made it to 25 weeks!  2 - It’s the first day of Fall - so glad to say good bye to the hottest, most oppressive summer on record! 3 - It’s “Field Day” at my kids’ elementary school, so they get to spend a few hours competing in friendly competitions with their friends outside, while raising money for school projects.  They look forward to it every year, and this one is no exception!  We usually work really hard at getting pledges to add to the fund drive, but it just wasn't in the cards this year!  But, they are taking the little bit they did raise, and I know it will make a difference in their school!


I’m a little sad to be missing things at home.  I missed several things this week, and it’s been a bit harder than I thought it would be.  Everything was left in VERY capable hands, but it was still a lonely feeling to know all this fun/exciting/different stuff was going on without me.  I missed my 2 days of set up out at the Fairgrounds for the Adorable Affordables sale - AND the pre-sale shopping frenzy that I love so much.  I missed the parent meeting for the math tutoring program Emma and Lara are participating in.  I missed Lara’s eye doctor appointment where she got to pick out new frames for her new glasses (I hear they are pink and sparkly and I can’t wait to see them!).  I missed Vision Night with Pastor Craig Groeschel at LifeChurch.tv Stillwater.  But most of all, I missed BEING with my family.  Jake called me 2 nights in a row in tears lamenting the fact that he had not seen me in DAYS!  A friend posted on my Facebook wall that we should try Skype.  I have never used it, but I think that might be a good idea.  I downloaded the software, but now I need 2 cameras with integrated mics - one for my laptop here and one for the desktop at home.


I am blessed by visitors, however!  And that is SO NICE on so many levels.  It not only makes the days go faster (which I love), it also helps me feel connected.  Plus, they bring me things I didn’t know I needed!  Like my sweet friend who used to live in Stillwater who is now in the City who had brought her 5 week old son to me TWICE for cuddle time.  Now THAT is a good visit!  :)  But the Lysol wipes, notepads, Diet Cokes, crackers, peanut butter and all the HUGS mean so much.  Thank you to ALL of you for making this more bearable.


I am still bleeding a tiny bit.  No new “incidents,” and I am still stable.  I have the IV in my arm “just in case,” but have had no fluids or meds other than my water I drink diligently, my prenatal vitamin, and the ever present Colace!  I did have some pretty painful (and annoying) groin pain last evening and last night (that is gone now due to a good night’s sleep and a shower) that the nurse helped me figure out was from Finn being LOW in my pelvis with “a body part” (we don’t know which one) that was hitting a nerve.  it was so painful it was making me nauseous!  But, sleeping on my side helped him move away from the area, and I feel fine this morning.

I hope everyone has a GREAT weekend!  I am really looking forward to seeing my family  I miss them so much!  And maybe we can get Sykpe set up and Jake and I can pray by computer each night instead of over the phone! 

(PS - Finn has the hiccups right now for the ump-teenth time in the last few days!)

What does it mean to be BOLD?

This past weekend, Lifechurch.tv and Pastor Craig Groeschel shared the second message in a series called BOLD.  The first week was called Amazing Boldness  and we learned that Boldness is a behavior born out of belief.  That God gives ordinary people extraordinary boldness and that your boldness will amaze the world.  This all came at an amazing time in my life, as I was in the middle of the being the boldest I have ever been.  This blog is my expression of BOLD!  Sharing Christ through the circumstances of my life, and praying that my words have touched, helped, or inspired someone – ANYONE – to be more like Christ and put their faith in Him. Not too long after this sermon was preached, I had an acquaintance tweet me, THANKING me for being BOLD.  That was a little affirmation that what I am doing here is making a difference – at least for that one person.

Fast Forward to week two: Bold Prayers.  This week we learned that what you pray for reflects what you believe about God.  Do you pray small, self-focused prayers?  Or do you pray Big, BOLD (Sun Stand Still) world changing prayers?  Pray for BOLDNESS!  Pray for MIRACLES!  If you have been following this blog for any length of time, you know the last 120 days have been an utter roller coaster for me and my family.  The disbelief of my brother’s death (4 months ago yesterday, in fact) and the circumstances surrounding it.  The shock of finding out we were expecting our fourth child and the wondrous surprise that was.  The terror of discovering we might lose the baby – a gift that had been presented to us; one that we never knew we even wanted. And, the miracle of being saved that tragedy.  All God’s work.  All for his glory.  All so I could learn to pray BOLD prayers and bear witness to miracles.  So that I could share these words with you, show you that our God is greater than anything you are facing, and encourage you to be faithful, and to be BOLD.

So, I have been thinking about this BOLD thing a lot the past few days.  At life group last night (shout out some LOVE to my LTC friends!), we went over the Talk It Over questions from this week (as best we could with a dozen kids running around!) and I got to share a little bit more of my story and what it means to me to be BOLD.  And how my journey with Christ has changed over the past 4 months, and what it FEELS like to be on this side of a miracle.  I told them I won’t feel completely comfortable until it is January and I am holding a healthy baby in my arms, but I KNOW that day is coming!  I feel blessed to know so many are praying for us, humbled to know that this life growing inside of me is already changing lives, and loved by so SO many people.  What an amazing demonstration of God’s purpose for our lives!  I received an email from a dear friend earlier this week reflecting on being BOLD, the miracle we have all gotten to be a part of, and how God uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things.  I want to share a portion of it with you:

I’m not just amazed by the journey you’ve already been on and the miracle that has taken place over the last 2 weeks.   I am so moved by you guys and the way you handled every step of the situation.  Believing and knowing that God would hear our prayers and remain faithful.  I look at both of your facebook pages and see the people that commented and joined you in prayer and I’m just blown away.  The number of people alone is incredible…Today I am moved by the impact that Shocker is making in so many of their lives before he/she is even here.  God is already using this baby to lead people to Christ and to witness His work and love in and through you.  This world better watch out for what is coming with the 6^th Dream Weaver!

 …I hope you see that through your trials, through your little Shocker, people can’t ignore the powerful move of God that has happened…

 

Be BOLD this week.  Pray for Boldness.  Seek ways to be bold in your everyday life.  Pray for miracles.  Watch God show off.

For a Little While...

I fell like I should have something to say, but I don’t, really. The last time I wrote anything was last Thursday. Today is Monday. The day after Easter. I had a good day yesterday, but I almost feel guilty about it. The Five Dream Weavers went to LifeChurch.tv Edmond to celebrate new life with a dear friend as he got Baptized, then went to his house to celebrate his wife’s birthday and Easter. It was a nice change of pace – even if we did experience white-knuckle driving in torrential downpours and see 2 wrecks.

Easter is a time of celebration. Of recognizing the sacrifice God made for us ALL by giving up his only son. Makes me think about being a parent and especially about being a parent of a son. But what does that look like for a mother who just lost her own son way too soon? On Facebook she said “I am happy Brian is spending his first Easter in the presence of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I cry because I miss him and I want him here with us.”

When I was pregnant with my twins, I had lots of sonograms. I remember the first time the technicians and doctors tried to determine the sex of the babies. They told me Twin A (called Jenna in utero, now Emma) was definitely a girl. I was a tiny bit disappointed. I had thought I was having 2 boys. Then, they told me Twin B (Barbara in utero, now Lara) was not cooperating and her gender was still in question. A few weeks later, same outcomes. At 33 weeks, they told me Twin B was “most likely” a girl. I will confess that I held out hope until the moment she was born that Lara would be a boy. But, I got 2 precious orange headed girls, and they still light up every day of my life with their love and tenacity! Fast forward a few years and I was pregnant again. I had a precautionary sonogram at 14 weeks because the one a t10 weeks revealed something my doctor wanted to look at again (turned out to be nothing). But, during that sonogram, the technician asked if we wanted to know the gender of the baby. We were a bit shocked, as we thought it was too early, and we hadn’t really discussed it. But, we said yes. And, found out we were going to have a SON! Talk about humbling… And to reflect on what he means to me now, after the death of my mother’s son and the Easter holiday focusing on how God turned Jesus over to his haters… WOW.

My pastor, Craig Groeschel, wrote and amazing poem and showed it as a video during the sermons this weekend. I had caught parts of it on Saturday night as I volunteered as an usher for the 2 services in Stillwater, but I finally got to see it in context on Sunday morning. Here is the video:

It has inspired me again to be weird and to see things from a different angle. Reminded me that it doesn’t matter that none of my girls’ clothes came from “Justice” as much as they would like for them to have, and that my family is blessed to have 2 cars that run (even if they aren’t pretty), a roof over our head, and a pantry (mostly) full of food. We will survive this season and we will SHINE our light for others to see. I will survive feeling burdened and overwhelmed. I will learn from the obstacles set before me and the pain that seems to consume me. I will cherish that fact that my SON climbs into bed with me almost every night and needs extra love and attention at every bedtime right now. After all, he’s only my son for a little while…

…because normal isn’t working

We all know people that are weird in a weird way.  And people that are weird in a good way.  But, what about people who are weird in a GOD way?  Craig Groeschel started a new series at Life Church this weekend called WEiRD.  Matthew 7:13-14 says “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.”

I am really excited about this series.  Pastor Craig is going to teach about what it means to be WEiRD!  Many people can walk the broad road and live a “normal” life, but only a FEW can be on the narrow road, be weird, go against the crowd, and live for God.  “If you want what normal people have, do what normal people do.”  What is normal?  Stressed, hurried, broke, in debt, broken relationships, troubled marriages, tension, messed up values?  “If you want what few people have, do what few people do.”  BE WEIRD!

Britt and I are sure people think we’re WEIRD because we start each day in a quiet place reading and studying the bible with youversion.com.  And I KNOW people think we are WEIRD because we are doing the unplugged Monday nights with our family (I know this because of the feedback we got on facebook!)  We are weird – we don’t have any credit cards or credit card debt.  If we don’t have cash, we don’t buy it.  And we sacrifice!  But you know what’s even weirder?  We are passionately in love with our Lord and Savior, each other, and our family.  The joy in our lives is deep and rooted in the truth of the Word.

You want to know more?  Ask me.  You want to hear the message?  Go to Lifechurch.tv and watch part 1 of the series, WEiRD!

OH – and Craig Grosechel wrote a book to accompany this series as well, also called WEiRD: Because Normal Isn’t Working – it comes out on this Tuesday (but we got advance copies at church this weekend!) and can be bought at Amazon.com. 

Are you going to be WEiRD?

Lent (Sacrifice)

My favorite definition of sacrifice is “giving up something you love, for something you love MORE.” I think the first time I heard this was a couple of years ago in a sermon by Craig Groeschel, and since then I have heard the same sentiment said a few different ways. So, as we start this season of Lent, I am choosing to make a sacrifice. I am giving up Diet Coke (caffeine/dark cola), in order to feel better.

You see, I love (LOVE) Diet Coke, but I love NOT feeling like I have for the last 2 weeks even MORE. I’ve done it before. Given up the DC. For LONG periods of time, even. I gave it up for 5 years while trying to conceive, then conceiving and breastfeeding twins. Then again when I was pregnant and breastfeeding my son. And then for 21+ days at the First of this year when I participated in the Daniel fast. And I know I have done it for Lent in the past as well. So, I know it can be done, and I know I can do it. And to help me along my way, I have also started a new bible reading plan designed just for Lent at youversion.com. To keep me on track and to remind me WHY I am sacrificing this tiny thing when Jesus gave it ALL!

So, the blog has been neglected the last 2 weeks basically because I have failed at my commitments. My commitment to working out, my commitment to losing weight, and my commitment to this blog. Once again, LIFE got in the way. My parents (who are part of the VILLAGE that helps raise my 3 children) were out of town for a few days, so our schedule was wacky, then I started not feeling well, only to find out that I had strep throat! 2+ days of being totally miserable, then 2+ more days of just feeling bad, and things were REALLY behind. Add to that, I think I had a mild reaction to the antibiotics I am on (Can I give THAT up for Lent? Antibiotics?) which left me feeling foggy and groggy and with a headache, which turned into a migraine on Sunday, and yesterday, I finally started to feel almost normal again. I have ONE MORE pill to take this afternoon and I will have completed my 10 day course of antibiotics! I am WELL again! So, this season of sacrifice is a good day to start over, I believe!

On the upside, during ALL of that, I MAINTAINED my weight again! For that, I am grateful! It’s nice to start out in the same place I left off, instead of having to take 2 steps (or more) backwards! So, here’s to SACRIFICE! What are you going to sacrifice this season?

Audacious

My husband and I got to experience a rare event yesterday.   He saw an invitation to a sermon taping for LifeChurch.tv on Facebook Monday, shared it with me.  We were intrigued, so we both used some vacation time from work and spent a couple of hours at the Edmond campus yesterday.  But this was no ordinary taping.  You see, it wasn’t our senior pastor, Craig Groeschel (whom I adore and feel gives God-breathed messages straight to me week after week), but another incredible man of God who is a close personal friend of Pastor Craig’s doing the talking.  A man whom I have come to admire since the first time I heard him speak in October of 2008 (it was the first time we ever went to LifeChurch Stillwater, and I said to my husband as we left, if this guy is a friend of the senior pastor here, I want to go to THIS church!).  A man who believes we can all pray miracle prayers and God will not only listen, but deliver.

We got the honor and the privilege of listening to Pastor Steven Furtick preach 2 “Sun Stand Still” messages yesterday.  I don’t think I have recovered yet.  Steven is the senior pastor for Elevation Church in Charlotte, North Carolina.  His church is only 5 years old and already has 4 locations.  It is the fastest growing church in the nation right now – surpassing LifeChurch.tv’s growth at this point in its life.  AMAZING.  His first book called “Sun Stand Still” came out last fall – it was one of the books (along with 2 of Pastor Craig’s) that my husband had pre-loaded on the Kindle I got for my birthday in October.  This book will ROCK your world and your thinking!  And it’s all God!  Doing amazing things through a truly talented and spirit filled pastor, teacher, author and leader.

As a part of their 5^th year anniversary, ElevationChurch put together a documentary, which is available to view online for free this week only.  My husband and I watched it Monday night, and were so inspired!  It is so refreshing to see how God moves like that!  I follow Pastor Steven on Twitter, and I read his blog several times a week.  There is a video clip from one of his sermons earlier in the year that really fires me up and makes me want to share God with others.  This guy is the REAL DEAL, and if you need to be encouraged or filled up, I urge you to take a few minutes and read or listen to some of his thoughts on the Kingdom.  You won’t be disappointed.

And, join my husband and I at a LifeChurch.tv campus, a network church or church online in a few weeks to hear Steven Furtick’s “Sun stand Still” messages.  I’ll be sure and remind you when they are coming up.  I can’t wait to hear it all again! In the meantime, I am re-reading the book…

Life… HAPPENS!

A school board bond and new member election, 2 more snow days, Valentine’s day parties, a cold, cheer performances, a migraine, out of state relatives in town, 2 weeks without my LifeGroup, Girl Scout cookie sales, and I look up and an ENTIRE WEEK has gone by since I worked out last!  How does that happen?   Oh yeah!  I’m a full time mom to 3 active and involved kids, a full time wife to my amazing husband, and I hold down a full time job at the University.  Some days, I am surprised myself at how I get it all done.  Don’t get me wrong!  I LOVE the chaos that is my life – most of this time.  And this week has been especially good.  Everyone seems to be getting along, I’ve laughed a lot, enjoyed the things we have done as a family, taken the time to be in God’s word every day, but my diet/exercise routine have suffered.

Pastor Craig (Groeschel) spoke a sermon last month called I Quit… Complaining.  I don’t think I am a complainer, but I can see where others might call me that.  I have a hard time discerning what is a “complaint” and what is a statement of fact.  Take my ailments from this past week as an example.  In my opening sentence, I stated that I had a cold, then a migraine.  FACTS.  But, because I mentioned them in a laundry list and basically used them as excuses for my less than stellar behavior, does that make them complaints?  I could go on about this forever – ask my husband or anyone in the lobby of LifeChurch.tv Stillwater that week as we stood around and discussed it after the Host Team huddle… I don’t want to be a complainer, but I want the facts to speak for themselves.  Fact is, I don’t know how to do that, and I end up sounding like a complainer…

But, I digress.  My point is that I need to recommit to my health and fitness this week.  I will weigh again on this upcoming Monday morning, so that is my first step of accountability.  I think I am coming to the end of this cold, so I should start feeling better.  We have all but a few boxes of the Girl Scout cookies sold, so that madness is winding down.  It looks like the window of opportunity is opening for me again, and it is totally up to me to SEIZE it and get back on track!  It’s all about the balance of things, right? Things shifted the past 7-10 days, and it is time to shift them back.

Momma said there’d be days like this…

Remember those tests I mentioned in the last post? Well, God threw a good one my way the last 24 hours. Luckily, nervous energy and excitement kept hunger at bay – I didn’t really eat much of anything the last 24 hours so the fasting was easy. But I prayed! BOY! Did I pray! And late last night, I listened. And early this morning, I listened harder and longer than I have in a long time. God showed me his answer a couple of hours ago.

Dreams are a funny thing. I used to tell my husband that I didn’t really dream about bigger and better and more because I would never have it anyway, so why bother. My husband is a dreamer. In the best way! He always has plans and dream and schemes to share with me! I love his outlook and his energy. Me? I’m more “practical.” But, over the past 5 years of our relationship, I have learned the value, and the FUN in dreaming – big bold dreams. I read Steven Furtick’s book “Sun Stand Still” and he calls it audacious faith. Finding that thing God leads you to that gives you a spark, then going for it! Craig Groeschel said in his message last week “You do what you can do. And trust God w/ the rest.” I did what I could do. Now it’s up to God.

And my dreams…

A Challenging Monday

Today is day 8 of my fast.  I just watched history streaming on my PC as the first woman governor of the great state of Oklahoma took her Oath of Office (Congrats, Mary Fallin – our 27^th Governor!), and it is snowing at a pretty steady clip here in North Central Oklahoma!  My drive to work took 3 times as long as it usually does, and I am hungry.  This is the first time I have really felt hungry the whole journey!  Last night, I had a headache again, but nothing like earlier in the week...  But feeling hunger is a new thing for me in this season.

I knew the snow was coming, so we had tried to be prepared as a family.  Got up early to make sure cars were warmed up, ice was scraped of windshields, kids had cold weather gear, etc.  Although the drive was long and tedious, it was GREAT to hear my 3 year old son chatter in AWE of all the white we saw on the way to day care this morning.  He says the funniest things!  He asked, “"Mom, how do all those cars get the snow off their screens? With their wipers?"  I assume he meant windshields...  (He says some funny stuff!  Follow him on Twitter @JakeWeaverSays) As is my usual, I drank my Shakeology on the way to work, and for some reason, it just didn’t last.  Due to all the other distractions this morning, I neglected to grab my usual fresh fruit snack or some nuts!  DARN!  But, I am praying for strength!  I know I will go home for lunch soon, and there is no way I am throwing in the towel at this point!

Since one of the areas of my life I am trying to improve on and hand over to God is my health and weight, I am using this fast not only as a time for spiritual growth and enlightenment, but also as a jump-off point for a lifestyle change in my eating and fitness.  That's why I became a Beachbody coach a few weeks back as well.  So, this morning,  I weighed.  The last time I was on a scale was on December 8, a month ago.  Since that time, I have lost 11 pounds.  It's a great start, but I have a long way to go...

I saw some great Daniel fast recipes on the LifeChurch.tv OKC Campus Facebook page, and I loved a ReTweet I saw from our senior pastor, Craig Groeschel this morning: “A diet changes the way you look. A fast changes the way you see!”  So true!  And I want to SEE more!  Time to dig deeper, go further, last longer!